Self Discovery

Sometimes life seems just peachy, maybe that is the time to look inside yourself and find out things about you that even you didn't know!Thats what happened to me... kinda. Actually I wasn't looking, it just sort of hit me, unexpectedly. I found out things about myself that I am still trying to fully comprehend. The tings I now know are hard, but I know God knew I was ready. If this had been revealed to me this time last year, I would have freaked out and died. (not really but you know what I mean.). I now realize that I have to know these things in order to move on in my life, no matter how hard it is. Well, Im not very good at ending these things. Until next time.

All at once.

Several things seem to be happening all at once in my life right now. Some are bad and some are hard, and still others are just change I'm not really read for. I feel like I am going through all of this and I am doing it alone. That is probably the hardest part. I feel like there is no one I can talk to and seek help from. I feel like no one is really listening or no one really cares. Its like the people (or person) who I am supposed to go to and want to go to, isn't here. I know my problems are insignificant, especially compared to those of some other people. But I wish there was someone that could help me. Someone who actually cared and didn't pretend.

The Break is over... At least it should be...

This past semester I grew so much and got so much better at spending quality time with GOD. Then, summer came... I guess I automatically thought a break from school = a break from GOD. Since summer started I think I have had GOD time once... not good. And its not like I don't have the time, I do nothing all day. Ha. No wonder everything seems to be going wrong in my life. I know that when I spend the time with him, he is there for me, but when I ignore him, how can I expect him to help me? Well, thats it! I am tired of this constant bad feeling and everything in my life going wrong. Its time to spend time with GOD.
I am sorry GOD for neglecting our time together. I am coming back to you!

Until next time...

Hurt

Does God put us in pain and hurt us to teach us stuff? or do we put ourselves through it, when the lesson can be learned an easier way? I hate feeling the way I do. I feel like maybe I am setting myself up for what keeps happening. I think I am making it better and that things are going to change, but they never do, and Just end up being disappointed and hurt... again. I'm tired of feeling like this, but I know if I try to stop it for good, there is someone else who would be hurt. Even tho they continually hurt me, I don't want to make anyone feel this bad. If they only knew how I feel, then maybe it would get better. I have told them before but maybe this time will work. Kind of like third time is the charm... maybe, Ill just have to do it and find out, but if I get hurt again, maybe its over...

Bitter-Sweetness and sore feet.

Did you know that if you walk around on a hardwood floor all day with no shoes on, ant the end of the day your feet will really hurt. So the past week or so everyone has been moving around. And yesterday/today was the day that I really felt the change. I am so glad to have all these new people living here and i really like our new room set up. But it hit me today really hard... N more Fatty room :( i am so sad to be losing a great roommate. yea i know she will just be in the room next door, but its really sad. and i also realized that some of the girls i lived with for a semester are in different houses now. I guess im just not a big fan of change...

New...

Today a lot of things are new... For one my age haha. yesterday was my birthday ad i must say... It was Fabulous! I love Everyone who did stuff for me! Big Sis for planning a party and, along with Ferrari and Corvette, taking me shopping. Thanks! Two Amazing Pledge sisters who came 2-3 hours just to be with me. Two other Amazing Pledge sisters who came. All the wonderful peeps who came to my party. Banjo the lamp= Most creative/one of the best presents ever! My Fatties... The sheets and notebook- Need i say more? Cousin Jig I do love Piglet. Krio and Lugi... Finally a new Bible!:) AP and Pop-Tart- preety flowers. Bembers I love the inspirational study gnome. Quill and Shonen Hello Kitty thanks. Armani... Dinner haha. Lalo and Crush thanks for the fire. Thank You. I LOVE YOU ALL!